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Advice#guideyouhomeIt's a metaphor!

It's a metaphor!

#guideyouhome

What’s it like to buy a house? Sit down til we tell you a story. You might have heard it before…  

It’s Sunday morning. You’ve woken up wrecked. Again. You turn over, lift your phone and stare at it for so long you go a bit blind. It’s Alex’s birthday today so you have to get out of bed. You look at the group chat to double check the plan for the day. It’s ‘Wicklow for a nice walk at 1pm’ because Alex is 32 now and ‘not really feeling the going-out scene’ anymore. Right. 

You go to Wicklow. You’re hungover, but hiding it and feigning just the right level of enthusiasm. You’re a good friend. And you know what, walks can be nice. And it only ever really drizzles in Wicklow, anyway. Can’t beat a bitta fresh air! 

Jeans and a pair of runners. You’ve set off and it’s grand so far. Slip to the back of the group so as to avoid the mingling. Still early. The ground is crunchy and all kinds of golden shades. Sensory delight. Oh! Little hill there. Unexpected, but pleasant. Dopamine secretion. Handy. 

The group picks up the pace and you stumble a little as you try to remove your zippy while Ian talks about tax, his 2.4 kids and the new found energy he has since giving up sugar and going to bed at a more reasonable hour. Sleep when the kids sleep, you know. It’s all about balance. Zippy tied to your waist. You round the corner, look up. It hits you. What the hell did you sign up for? You hate Alex. That view is breath taking though. And it’s only going to get better as you climb, right? Alex isn’t so bad. 

Bet into it now, your thighs burn. Your heart stiffens. Your ears pop. Misery. Why did you agree to this? You trudge. For a moment, the sun comes out. Tree branches part just enough to let little bolts of light through and you can literally see the leaves change colour before your eyes. Everything twinkles. You LOVE Alex!  

You can probably finish the story from here. It was a hike all along. Alex said walk, but Alex knew that a walk would get you to agree to the expedition quicker. What’s a white lie among friends? And somewhere at the back of your mind… you knew what was coming. And you got through it. Maybe there was a pint at the end, maybe just a jubilant whoop from the back. But the point is, at all times, there was an end in sight. It was all worth it, lessons were learned, and feelings were felt: The End. 

Does this have anything to do with mortgage approval? No. But a process is a process and buying a house is stressful. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll get your keys and you’ll never talk about it again. In a lot of ways, it mimics classic narrative structures. It’s a good old-fashioned story. There are twists, turns, plot-holes (some literal, some metaphorical), bad guys, good guys, bad-guys-disguised-as-good-guys, straight up villains, straight up heroes, elation, conflict.  Chaos. 

But, will it eventually end? Yes. Will you grow as a person as a result? Sure. Will you come through it relatively unscathed and ready for the next step? Ask again later. 

Moral of the story? Keep the head up – you’ll be grand. 

#guideyouhome
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